Sunday, February 3, 2013


So yesterday afternoon in class, I came very close to simply just walking out. I asked Mr Frick what test I was on for Drafting and Design... "Ummm... Hailey?" soon as he said that, my heart dropped. Something went wrong. "We're going to have to regroup, I can't find what test you were on last because the whole file is invalid"... It's all gone, all my tests, all my chapters.... FFS(for F*cks sake)... So I did my best to just avoid that for the time being.
Did some research to try to find out why the low sex drive, asked snakeface, he asked what'd changed since I was last able to be okay during that, umm well lets see.... That was before Christmas, and here's the list:
  • Double School- night classes - three nights a week
  • Stress,
  • Home life,
  • Sickness, anti-biotics.
  • Change in BC 
  • Bleeding for a month straight
  • Depression
  • More sleeping problems
And you wonder why I'm sick..."That's just what I came with for the time. The bleeding bit caught his attention. "Well no wonder, that'd really throw off the sex drive." He also suggested foreplay, before the bedroom, teasing and such, get back into fetishes, reading, flirting, (sexy and romantic)dates/activities, etc. Is it sad when I've been trying all of these and just cannot get back into the good mood? What really sucks, fooling around and getting into mischief was my way of de-stressing, so it is just building and building up. Only thing that I haven't tried yet are the dates, just no time to go out, or the money to do anything. I'm out of ideas on what to do. I guess I just have to wait again. Poor Rick, he's all worried, and wants to help, not to mention he's frisky and I just can't do anything, and that causes problems for him getting off. *Sigh* it's a never ending cycle. I get off to him getting off, he gets off to me getting off. Not to mention, if the girl's hurt, it usually always causes problems for the guy, unless he's a pig... *shiver*
More I thought on this by the end of class, more pissed off I got. Rick normally hugs me when he picks me up, I told him "don't even think about it" with just a look. My hair was driving me crazy as well, too short to tie back, too long to keep out of your face. I'd resorted to a rubberband in my desk to try to pull back. Yah that didn't work for long. So I asked Rick to take me to Walmart near by to get some hair supplies, he bought them and some yarn and a hook for me to crochet and try to calm down. Sweet guy, I'm working on a full size blanket with some baby yarn, hopefully it'll be softer than the Red Heart yarn, which always seem too coarse and wouldn't give much.
I got my hair fixed, crocheted a full 8' strand, and half way back across before we had to leave for class. I stopped by the oil floor to talk to Art Club, talked to the vp, I can't remember her name for the life of me. She'll start sending me emails, and getting me into the art community, which is really helpful, she was really excited I was looking at BFA for Studio Art, there weren't enough of them. I was happy with that reply.
I got to drawing class, set up shot, and got to work. By the time end of class came, I'd done my best work, Taylor, the architecture guy, yes I finally got a name, said it was my best work as well, he'd been keeping an eye on it. Which was nice, he and his buddy always seem to sit behind me.

I know this is odd and completely out of time. I just realized from here, Sunday February 3rd, that this hadn't been posted on Friday like I'd intended. Oops. Oh well, more to write

We stayed late in the art department building until between 10-and 10:30, I don't remember exactly what time we left because I got so far into it. I love the university, I'm no longer treated like a kid and I can stay late as I want, come and go as I want, outside of class of course, and work when I can. Yay! No more needing to have a teacher/faculty member in watching me at all times!
We went home, for some reason, Mum and Dad were still awake. We sat around talking for a looong time, Rick showed them his new shiny Demaskus(spelling error?) steel Katana. Ooo it is so pretty. And sharp as *insert word here*, I cut my hair on it. I kid you not.
On came the sleepy time.
Friday morning came, I wish we could have skipped that. Ended up running late to class, so we went in, I put my stuff in class, clocked in, and went up to eat breakfast. Got to have blueberry strudel. Yum.
When I got back down to class, it looked like someone had thrown a hornets nest into the classroom. Everyone was running around trying to log on computer and trying to go to John, an all day student, to find out what needed to be rendered. Found out that he had a project due that day and had been up until 2am trying to finish it. We had every working computer, that 23(because one wont go past startup screen) rendering photos. We had to pull a student out of Digital Media to help us put together the walk through of the cupcake shop. That took 12 computers during lunch to cut a 12 hour long rendering time for the video, down to 1 hour for all of it. Thank goodness we had Mike around to help us for that. He won Nationals last year for SkillsUSA. So we got it done by afternoon. I found out the guys from automotive I did the picture editing for, they messed up and have to bring me more photos..
Oh, I also set Monty up for two proms this spring, I felt bad because I promised him I'd go with him this year when he asked me last year and I'd agreed with Little Red.

I'm sorry this isn't going well tonight. My brain is fried, so I can't finish writing this...What should have taken me 20 minutes to write down is taking me over an hour to write. My brain is warping this to where I can't focus on what I'm doing, reading, writing, or listening. I'm completely zoning out on things that aren't there. I've also got a migraine from photosensitivity that's causing me to get sick to my stomach, to where Rick has to blindfold me for the night. That sucks when you have to study and write.

Maybe tomorrow will get better and I can focus; for the time being, I'm logging off, blindfolding again, and going to bed. Maybe I can ask Ms Michelle how to do art as a blind person/blindfolded.

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